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EraseRestart, 19th issue: Eating Disorders 💜 . I never quite felt comfortable with my weight and what I saw in the mirror. When I was 19 years old, I became obsessed with weighing myself and trying to “score” lower. For me, it started after a back injury I had at the drama school. I thought that the thinner I became, the easier the doctor would access my vertebrae during therapy, the faster I’d get out of bed. But even after my back got better, I kept up with my new, unhealthy eating habits. There would be days I wouldn’t even drink water. I reached 38 kgs. Luckily – and with the help of my family, I managed to get out of that spiral… but then the hormonal issues kicked in, leading to weight gain, mostly due to fluid retention… I would starve myself all day but would still gain grams, kilos. Going from the “you should eat something” to the “you’re not so light anymore huh? You’ve gained so much weight” – having people almost constantly commenting on my weight, both at the drama school and in my band surrounding, I felt ugly and useless. Even though my hormone levels balanced out within a year or so – whether I was on the thinner or the fuller end, I never truly managed to embrace myself. So this issue is personal – yet filled with valuable (and hopefully helpful) information. If you’re struggling with an eating disorder, please do seek out for help. I know first hand that it never truly goes away, but it can get better – that I can promise. Thank you for stopping by – SP 💜💜 PS. What helped me get better and re-develop a healthy relationship with food was cooking. I would find the most complex, the most difficult recipes – those that required hard-to-find ingredients and took ages to prepare. Through enjoying the process, I would slowly start enjoying tasting my creations, too. It took a long time, but that’s what worked out for me – shout-out to Nigel Slater for having some of the most creative and delicate recipes. – S. x . . . #eatingdisorders #beatingeatingdisorders #foodfreedom #mentalhealthmatters #edwarriors #edrecovery #endthestigma

Ein Beitrag geteilt von Sarah P. (@sarahpofficial) am Sep 12, 2019 um 10:58 PDT